Here’s the thing about love: It’s hard to put into words.
Disclaimer: It was a private post before.
Until now I have been writing poems for you. But, here is a fact, I’m a bad poet. I can write stories better than poems. But today, I’m not gonna write either of them as today I will be writing about my feelings and emotions. What you are in my eyes and why I care so much about you. I’d also be sharing a few of my secrets with you which very few people know of.
Before starting, take it as a disclaimer. As I am writing about my feelings at places you could see me drifting away from the main topic. At places, you might think, “Wait, what was that?”. Sorry beforehand.
I am an average guy from an upper middle-class family who was once an introvert. Times change and so did I. The new me tries to put a smile on everyone’s face and also tries to keep a smiling face as it is always easy to smile than to tell people about your problems, at which they laugh.
I may look like a carefree person who likes to chill and have fun. But wait, that is what I try to show to the world. You only know what I want you to know about me. But from the inside, I’m a boy who lost his mother at the age of 1, the one who has been harassed and mistreated to the core in his childhood, the one who has had his heart broken multiple times by the ones that meant the world to him.
You already know much about me. So, let’s end my topic here and move on to you.
I thank the odds that we met. I was at my friend’s place and Jhotwara and I get a call from him saying come home, we are going to see a girl. I said you go, I’m not interested. But then he kept on pushing me and somehow I couldn’t refuse.
While we were on the way to the mall he kept on telling me about you, how you are (he doesn’t know an iota of you). He was like, you take full advantage of her in any way you like. She won’t be saying anything. As I always do, I let him ramble on and sat quietly scrolling my Facebook news feed.
15 minutes later, we were there. I called you up and you said, why are you putting on caps? Couldn’t you find something else? You could have worn them too. Prior to that when I called you and was unable to lie you laughed at me. Till now, I was sure of one thing, you have a good sense of humor.
I am shy when it comes to talking with strangers for the first time. That’s why I didn’t even say Hi to you. Sorry.
Time passed by and all this time I was observing you, silently, admiring the way you smiled, the way you cracked jokes, the way you twitch your mouth sideways. There was something that was attracting me towards you. Every passing second I was being blinded by your radiance.
When we were playing truth and dare the way you participated and the way you said I love You to that man over there, you bewitched me with your glam. I knew that you were quite opposite of what I knew of you from “Him”.
Whenever I meet someone for the first time I observe that person silently and if that person is worth my attention, I try to be the best for him/her. The way you were so frank with me and the way you shared things made me more inclined towards you.
Dimpy, you are that special girl which good human dreams of to be in his life. You’re a gem ?
Whenever I talk with you, time just flies by. Our conversations seem never ending to me. I can go on to talking with you for days without ever getting tired.
After so many heartbreaks I had lost the hope of finding a girl worth keeping. I’m glad I found you. The perfect person.
The kind of person who understands me in such a way that no one else can. The kind of person I’d die for.
We have so many common interests, the feelings which we share are mutual. You’re perfect to me. And, I love you for that. I just can’t deny myself the simplest pleasures of loving you. You bring out the best in me. You understand many of my feelings which I don’t even speak of.
To me, You’re like a bar of chocolate in the hand of a kid. Which he doesn’t want to share with anyone.
Behind that smiling face of yours, you have so many scars and feelings which are invisible to the most of the people. But I understand you. I know what you really mean when you say something. Even the slightest change in you won’t go unnoticed by my eyes.
It has been only 3 days since we met and yet you are a crucial part of my life now. The only person who understand me so much. These three days are not merely three days. It’s like you gave me a forever within the numbered days.
It’s like we have some special connection. As if we know each other since ages. I know it is pretty early for me to say this but yes, I can trust you with my eyes closed. I love you so damn much.
In my life, I have always lost the ones whom I thought would be there for me. It’s in my destiny. But you are a keeper. I can’t let go of you. I’m so scared of losing you that even the slightest thought of it sends shivers through my body.
Those 72 minutes from 6:30 P.M. to 7:42 P.M. were the worst 72 minutes of my life. Where you were asking me to leave. Wish I could show you how terrible I felt in those moments.
Dimple, just think about it. Put yourself in my shoes and think how it would have felt. Just to give you an idea, in the afternoon when you were so unaware of the whole fiasco when you were really happy. It pained me so much seeing you with him. You saw my reaction. I couldn’t see it. I wanted to leave but it would have been rude so I sat there humming a song in my mind. That is what I do in a helpless situation.
Now just imagine how bad it would have felt to see a saddened version of you. I was feeling so helpless, leaving you there all by yourself.
Sweetie, I know you went through a lot. I have been there too and I know exactly how it feels to have your trust betrayed. But we can’t let others control us. Definitely not the ones who don’t know a thing about us.
You know the thing with people is when they can’t have something they start abusing it. No matter if you are the best or the worst they’ll keep on blabbering. What people think of us can’t decide who we really are. I know who you really are. You have the purest heart and the most sacred soul of all the people that I know of.
I really mean it when I say you’re one in a million. I have fallen so deep for you. You are the one whom I can trust to wipe my tears away. You are the one whose single text brightens up my face.
I love you Dimpy. I really do. From the core of my heart. You’re perfect just the way you are. Don’t ever let douchebags change you. They are not worthy of that power.
You know I could go on writing about you forever and the lines will extend up to miles. I wanna sit somewhere alone with you and tell you more about me and you.
I am fumbling for the words to describe you. But alas! those mere words don’t have it in them to describe you. You’re someone whom I could praise forever and still won’t be satisfied.
Here is something that I am promising you, I will never let any harm come to you. I won’t let even the shadows of pain and sorrow touch you. I’ll be there with and for you. Forever & after.
It’s 4:22 A.M. now. Girl, I’m missing you so damn much. I think that maybe now I should stop. I’ll tell you more when we are together.
Before ending this post, here are a few special lines for you:-
Thinking of you, keeps me awake. Dreaming of you, keeps me asleep. Being with you, keeps me alive.
Love you always.