I was trying to sleep but something happened which rendered me sleepless. I tried a lot to sleep. The fitness band on my right wrist kept me giving gentle nudges to remind that I was lying but wasn’t asleep.
Many thoughts are running through my mind right now. I couldn’t hold those thoughts and hence, came running to you to write everything out. Although this diary entry isn’t much reminiscing yet, let’s go ahead!
The day started normally as it would have on any other day. Except I slept till ~12:30 PM.
I am accustomed to it now. Everything which keeps on happening with me every now and then. The thing which breaks me up from the inside. The thing that hurt like hell. Yet, I am a smiler and I can’t let my agony out in front of anyone.
Trust me dear diary, from the inside, I am cut, broken, defeated. I can’t take it much longer. Not anymore. Seriously, my life sucks.
Then on the other side there is one girl who gives me hope, shows me a ray of light of how beautiful this life can be. And here I am, letting out everything on her, making her cry every now and then. I try and act so happy but deep down, I am scared of losing her like hell.
The reason behind all of this is the person whom I mistook as my brother. Who came out to be the one whom you should never cast a glance upon.
We have had these small fights, serious fights where he walked away as if nothing mattered. I was the one who always fell back, trying to keep things together in a perfect sync and harmony.
I don’t know what have I done wrong in my life that Karma keeps biting me back.
This time, I didn’t have any fight with him but, every ounce of blood in my body is raging against him. I never wanna see his face again let alone the fact of being with him.
So, now, let’s cut the crap and get straight to the point about whatever shit happened.
I have been trying from past week to spend some time alone with Yukti, in peace. To discuss the problems she is facing and to help her with the all the trauma.
I wasn’t getting a single perfect day till today. Everything was fine, going as it should, perfect. Only till the time this douche-bag poked his shitty head in between.
From the past few days he’s been acting totally strange full of attitude which I don’t give a fuck about. He’s behaving as if he’s some kind of fucking millionaire. He calls it reflex of his episode with Anushree. In my opinion whatever that girl did was 110% right. She was at fault but not that much.
He treated her like crap. Who would want that? Let me guess. Yeah, Nobody!
I don’t know what is the cause of his inhumane behavior but whatever it is, it is not because of Anushree. I can bet. Because, he never really had feelings for that girl.
What am I even talking about this ?
After all this I have finally realized that he is very similar to that bitch called, Saloni. He comes and acts friendly with me whenever he is some sort of financial crisis. I shouldn’t be saying this but his actions have forced me to do so. Now come bitch, I’ll show you how low I can get.
I have decided to but all my feeling for him to the curb and don’t even give a damn about him. Because, he doesn’t deserve even an iota of my attention.
Enough with this fake attitude showoff. You think you are some super VVIP? Nah bitch! You are just an other low life. I have seen many such in my limited life.
If I came down at showing off then you would be no where near me. Yet, I resist. Coz, I fucking care about you scumbag! But worry not. Not anymore. Go, fuck yourself! ????
— To be updated.